Originally posted 2017-08-29 10:21:28.
Hi!
Well, it is Countdown Day-10! Appreciation is on my mind. Have you ever gotten all geared up to cry; and something occurred that changed your mind? That’s what happened to me last night. I looked at the time on my phone; saw that it was after midnight; and got ready to cry. It’s August 29. 37 years ago, my baby was born. Tears were ready to burst forth. But something caught my attention.
I read an article on Facebook about a baby born with no eyes. As I read the mother’s words; appreciation popped into my thoughts. I heard, “Rochelle, do not cry yourself to sleep about Mika being gone. Thank God she lived 33+ years with her sight. Thank God for the time she had on this earth.”
So I say, “Thank you Lord. Thank you for giving me 33+ years to watch my daughter succeed in life. Thank you Lord! She obtained a Bachelors 
and a Masters Degree.
You blessed her with a wonderful, loving husband; 
and a bouncing baby boy; 
who could see and hear. You blessed her to become a school teacher. Thank you Lord!”
Though Mika suffered throughout her life from Sickle Cell Anemia; she had some good times. She would not allow the pain crises and frequent hospital stays to stop her.
She loved you Lord. Thank you.
I miss my daughter Lord. But, I appreciate you for giving us the time we had. 
I really wish she was here with us. Yet, I thank you Lord! Thank you for the time we had. When she died; it devastated us. A part of me is no longer here. But, Lord, I yet thank you.
Now I have memories. 
Lord, thank you for memories.. Thank you for joyful memories. 
Thank you Lord for giving us the time we shared. Though, I miss my precious little girl;
my heart aches for her husband, son and her brothers. 
Lord, please help them. Only you can help them to keep pressing on. Only you can help them to find joy in you. Lord, bless James to find him a wife; and Jordan a new mommy. Lord bless Justin and Melvin to become successful men; find wives; get married; and have loving families. Lord bless Jordan as he grows into the big boy, teen, young man and man his mommy wanted him to be. Lord save their souls. Please Lord.
Mika being gone has left a gaping hole in my heart. 
But, I believe God is able to fill that hole with his love; and He will. God makes no mistakes. So, as I write these words; I say, “Yes Lord!”
Today is Mika’s birthdate. She was not my god. She was my daughter. 
It’s a blessing to thank God for blessing you. I’m blessed with sons; Justin and Melvin; son-in-law James; and grandson Jordan. I thank God for those four wonderful guys. But today is about Mika.
I choose to honor her memory today.
At this particular moment, I feel joy and pain.
There are still painful memories. No mother should have to experience the death of her child. No mother should have to watch her child suffer as Mika did the months leading to her death. Yet; though Mika suffered tremendously; she’s in no more pain. She was saved; and I take joy in her spending eternity with Jesus, in Heaven. I just believe her smile is much greater now; than the beautiful smile she had on earth.
Even though pain is real; prayer exceeds pain in power.
No grandmother should have to hear her grand baby say about his dead mother; “I want my mommy.” Nor should she have to hear him cry at school and tell her, “The kids make fun of me because, my mommy is dead.” But if she does; the only thing to do is comfort him, pray; and don’t let him see her tears, while he’s crying.
The agony is heart wrenching. When Mika died, I was so hurt. I thought God had forsaken me. But today. Though the pain is here; I know without a doubt; God loves me and my sons. 
I’m so glad, the Lord helped me get through those times. I know more trying days are ahead. But, today; I choose to thank God.
There’s a song in my spirit.
“Somebody prayed for me. Had me on their mind. Took the time and prayed for me. I’m so glad they prayed. I’m so glad they prayed. I’m so glad they prayed for me”
One day, I prayed and asked God to help me smile, when I think of Mika. Tears come; then the smiles come. I’m a work in progress. Thank you Lord for blessing me with such a beautiful daughter. 
Inside and out.
I wish she was here so we could celebrate, with her, the birthday tradition she started. If she was alive, I would go buy a small cake; a 3 and a 7 candle; and put them on the cake. When Mika came over; I would light the candles so she could make a wish, and blow them out; after we sang Happy Birthday, But oh, well!
To keep the tradition,; Jordan wants us to get a small cake; place the 3 and 7 candles on it; and light them in honor of his mommy. Then he’s going to sing, make a wish and blow them out. He’s an energetic 6-year-old with so much drive. He wants to go to one of his mommy’s favorite restaurants today. He wants to celebrate his mommy’s life.
Jordan’s daddy is going to make that happen for him. No tears today. Just great memories; and new traditions. Thank you Lord!
Even with Mika gone; God is still fulfilling His personal promises.
God has made me a recipient of Jesus’ blessing; through Isaiah’s prophecy in His Holy Word: 
“The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound; To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn; To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.” (Isaiah 61:1-3 KJV)
Well, my friends, there are so many reasons to have appreciation. I appreciate God for blessing me to have Tamika as my daughter, and oldest child.
I appreciate God for blessing me to birth Justin and Melvin. I appreciate God for James finding a wife in his best friend, Mika; and marrying her. I appreciate God for blessing Mika and James with Jordan; thus blessing me with a grandson. I appreciate God for blessing Jordan to have joy. I appreciate God for saving Tamika’s soul; and giving her access to eternity with Him. I appreciate God for saving, sanctifying; and filling me with the precious Holy Ghost.
Thank you for joining me today. I’m looking forward to Countdown Day-9. We will talk soon.
Blessing!
Rochelle
